Family happiness is what he and she build together, inviting Jesus into these relationships, Who is the solid Foundation of any building. If someone is removed from this union or their own rules are introduced that come from a selfish heart, then it's unlikely that anything good will come of it.
If I see that my wife is trying her best to create authority for me in the eyes of my children, but I myself by my behavior and attitude destroy everything she builds, then it's possible that my spouse will be happy in relationships with the Lord and in her principles, but not in my company. And the children will feel guilty for my selfishness. I will consider myself right.
But still the woman's role in building authority for her husband is quite large. In the Bible there is a story about Abigail, Nabal's wife, who with her love for her husband saved his life from inevitable death and at the same time evoked indisputable respect from those who planned this reprisal. We read 1 Samuel 25:2-42.
A wife who cooperates with God has amazing influence on her environment. Each of us knows such women who, having their "Nabals" in their families, do everything possible so that their family is preserved, and all household members have comfort and care. And only the Lord knows how many tears were shed by His daughters so that their selfish husbands would have a cozy home and sincere hospitality.
There is a narrow path of building family happiness that is approved by God, and walking on which, you won't get lost. This is a path where husband and wife love each other, show mutual respect and preserve a friendly spirit under any circumstances. What could be more beautiful than when you create authority for a person you sincerely love and receive the same attitude from him in return? Building authority with such an arrangement of things becomes a natural process in forming family happiness. The mother won't be able to hide her love for her husband, and children will see and feel this in every conversation she has about daddy. The spirit of love is contagious, and children's hearts don't know anything else yet, and they will have to take this position, which is naturally demanded by their souls.
Many of you, reading these lessons, see a completely different picture in your families and think that this is impossible to fix. But we have a wonderful God Who can make something beautiful out of nothing, resurrect the dead and instill hope where there is none. We all once wandered like sheep without a flock, but the Lord gathered us and gave us salvation, and through us now saves others. For God there are no incurable diseases, but there are incurable people. So let's not lose hope and see such things that we ourselves will be amazed. Jeremiah 33:3.
Spouses who love each other are very good material for implementing any of God's plans. But for these plans to be realized, both sides need to know them and make a joint decision to go this way and build in this direction. If a husband, in his own way loving his wife, thinks that authority is guaranteed to him, and the wife doesn't even have a concept of what this is and why it's needed, then it's quite possible that instead of kind words, right actions and wise instructions, she will simply remain silent and inwardly love her chosen one, considering that she doesn't need to give him excessive advertising even to his children. And it turns out that a loving father is good only when he is personally present at home.
If I have close relationships with Jesus, believe in Him, wait for Him, but don't tell anyone about Him, don't create authority for Him, then who will know Christ in my behavior? Who will want to give Him their life in response to my silence? Who will be interested in building personal relationships with One Whom I don't advertise? Faith comes from hearing, and hearing from the word of God (Romans 10:17).
A loving wife should become a witness of her relationships with a loving father for her children, and then children's observations and mommy's instructions will build in the child's mind what will be firmly established in their hearts for life.
Building father's authority is a lifelong work and this is what unites all family members into one whole society, relationships in which will be strong until death and will spread to new families for a thousand generations.
The husband with his kind attitude, words and deeds lays a solid foundation for further building, and with his behavior affirms all the wife's efforts and helps her form the right image of father in children's consciousness. Children who have a clear example of father's love in their home will find it easy to imagine the unconditional love of the Heavenly Father. Their earthly daddy will always be a prototype of the Heavenly One.
Father's love for his household will be expressed not in earning means for living, on which many husbands place the main emphasis, but also in the personal example of his care for household members, in fulfilling promises, in fair treatment, in respecting others' choices, in direct participation in family life, in respectful and tender attitude toward the mother, in the ability to listen and delve into the essence of any problems, in easy and constant availability, in the role of spiritual leader and mentor, in manifestation of unconditional love and in everything else that love suggests to his heart.
How long do beautiful and cozy dwellings take to build? Very long, a whole lifetime. And it's very good for everyone to live in them. And how quickly can a cozy home be destroyed? Very quickly, especially if there's a war. Any anger, unfaithfulness, evil spirit, failure to fulfill promises, indifference to family needs, deception is destructive, and destructive not only to father's authority, but also to the souls of all household members. But there is hope and good news that God can restore ruins and erect beautiful palaces from ruins, if spouses believe in this and agree among themselves (Amos 3:3).
We are not created for constant war with each other. Such relationships end in divorce or lead to mutual peace, where both understood that something needs to be changed and there's no point in fighting, because everything can be agreed upon. And spouses begin at the level of their thoughts to drive out the enemy of the soul and not give him place in their hearts.
Family happiness is worth going toward, worth fighting for, worth living cozily in. This is part of God's plan for our salvation, in which we will be protected from many temptations and endowed with special strength.
A wife who builds authority for her husband in children's eyes is the same kind of God's worker as a pastor who seeks lost sheep and brings them to God's flock. A wise mother, building authority for the father of her children, thereby fulfills God's will, worships God in spirit and truth and has abundant God's support and personal participation of the Holy Spirit in all her enterprises.
The path of selfishness leads the soul to a dead end of despair, fear and disappointments, and God's path of love, happiness and friendship opens endless perspectives for constant development, for overcoming difficulties, for spiritual growth and for eternal God's blessings, which only wait their turn to pour into the lives of thirsting, seeking and loving souls.
Building authority for her husband is the best thing a wife can think of for the good of her entire family, and she will never be alone in this building.
Questions for Reflection
Please read 1 Corinthians 3:8-17; Matthew 7:24-27; 1 Samuel 25:2-42; Colossians 3:14; Galatians 6:2; Joshua 24:15; Psalm 126:1; Proverbs 11:14; 14:1; Philippians 2:14-16, in light of this lesson. What other verses from the Bible came to your mind? What did you understand from this lesson? Why is family happiness compared to building, and who is its foundation? What does the biblical story of Abigail and Nabal teach us? How does a wife's cooperation with God affect the atmosphere in the family? Why is it important not only to love, but also to speak about your love? Why is building father's authority a lifelong work? What specific actions does a husband take to lay the foundation of his authority? Why is it important that the earthly father be a prototype of the Heavenly Father for children? Why is silent love of wife for husband and husband for wife not enough? How are the father's spiritual leadership and his authority in the family connected? Why is respectful treatment of the wife by the husband important before children? Why is building family happiness part of God's Plan of salvation?