When I met my future wife, we spent all the time between my business trips together, thinking of places we could go and things we could do. The romance of travel and shopping trips were our favorite ways to spend time. No political situation troubled us. We even managed to vacation in a country where military operations were taking place. Our vacation spot was located near a mined area. But such things did not concern us very much. We lived our own lives, and we were happy.
Everything was arranged around us and our relationship, and it seemed that nothing could interfere with our romance.
In 1993, we were offered the opportunity to move permanently to Germany. We regarded it as another journey and agreed. No sooner said than done.
And so, in a foreign country, we received residence permits and began exploring the local sights and stores. Every idea was immediately discussed and put into practice. A new faith in God was also added to our lives.
After six months in Germany, my wife told me that she was pregnant and showed me the ultrasound image of our future daughter. I understood that great changes would soon take place in our lives, and I was not mistaken.
In September 1994, Daniela was born into this world. From the first minute of her life, she loudly expressed her opinion, greatly delighting us and all the doctors. Our entire life underwent serious changes. We began arranging our daily life around the newest member of our family. We did not ask what she wanted from us, where she had suddenly come from, or how long she intended to interfere with our living, sleeping, and resting. We accepted this little miracle as a gift from the Lord and had no intention of getting rid of her. No one explained to us that children are forever. Somehow, we immediately figured this out for ourselves.
Our entire life now revolved around this little child, who periodically reminded us of her presence very loudly or protested against our failure to give her proper attention.
From the first days of her existence, this little person entered our lives rapidly and became so firmly established within our hearts that we could no longer imagine life without her.
As Daniela grew, she passed through various stages in the formation of her personality, and I saw her in different states of mind and moods. Yet the thought that she interfered with my life, or that this world would be better without her, never even occurred to me. She entered our world to take her place within my heart forever and never leave it.
God gives me friends whom I can choose or who choose me. Once, I lived without them and did not suffer at all because my future friends were wandering somewhere in the world and not making any particular effort to find me. My heart knew none of those whom I had not yet met as friends. It waited calmly for the time when it could open itself to someone and receive that person.
Many passersby entered my life, visited me briefly, and then left forever. I became accustomed to the idea that the transit of people through my heart is a normal condition of life in our world.
But people also began appearing in my life who entered my soul in order to remain there forever. When my heart accepted this new person as a friend, there was no longer any thought that he should disappear or leave as quickly as possible.
Becoming acquainted with Jesus opened new possibilities for gaining new friends. But first, the Lord Himself became my Friend. He occupied within me a space as great as Himself—a place that had formerly stood empty, waiting for the day when it would become warm through the presence of the One Who had every right to it, although He stood modestly at the door of my heart and knocked quietly. I admitted Christ, and He became the One around Whom my entire life began to revolve. I can no longer imagine life without Him, and His place within my heart belongs only to Him.
But the Lord loves giving surprises. He continually invites different people into my life, giving me the opportunity to draw close to them and fill my heart with some of them. How fascinating this is!
It turns out that I was self-sufficient and needed no one. Then suddenly a friend burst into my life, opened my soul through his joy, and became my friend so that he could always remain one.
My inborn selfishness resists such companionship and continually desires to separate me from the people who are dear to me. But Jesus gives me a special heartfelt attachment to my friends called love and friendliness. Without this Heavenly glue, my heart would be unable to hold anyone and would suffer greatly from every broken relationship, leaving behind the marks of painful loss. But love binds my will so firmly to all my friends that I can no longer imagine how to live without them. At times they may be invisible like the stars, but I know they exist.
Jesus not only gives me new friends but also teaches me to love them. Love not only treats my dear friends kindly; it also makes them mine forever, establishing them within my heart as permanent residents.
When a friend becomes my friend, he becomes my friend forever. I cannot tell him, ‘Let us be friends for a year and then decide whether we should continue together.’ That is not friendship but merely a relationship. Friendship is something Eternal: it begins at a particular time but never ends.
God does not give me a child for a few years and then give that child to someone else. He will not tear from my heart those whom I have registered there forever. This is the Lord’s plan: that we give one another as gifts forever. Through His love, He binds our relationships eternally. He desires to teach us this here and now by commanding us to love one another.
Everything bound within my heart by love remains there forever.
We read in Isaiah 49:15–16: ‘Can a woman forget her sucking child, that she should not have compassion on the son of her womb? yea, they may forget, yet will I not forget thee. Behold, I have graven thee upon the palms of My hands; thy walls are continually before Me.’
God desires to endow me with the qualities of His love so that I will never forget those whom the Lord has given me to be my friends forever. At the same time, He gives me to my friends so that through His love they may bind me to their hearts as well. Only such bonds will be accepted by Heaven. Then within this friendship and love, we will possess an Eternal blessing.
If a mother of many children were asked which child she did not need and which one she could easily give away and forget, I believe the normal answer would be, ‘None of them.’ The same answer can be given concerning the friends of my heart. Love has made them mine forever, so that I will never give any of them away to anyone.
Although the enemy of the soul will try to make me disappointed in my friends, love will not allow me to lose these souls who are dear to me. They are mine eternally, and only death can separate us for a short time. But at the glorious Coming of our Lord Jesus, love will unite us again into one Heavenly family so that we will never be separated again.
There is a great deal of room within my heart. There will be enough for everyone Jesus gives me to love forever.
I am committed to love, but I cannot force my friend to treat me in the same way. That decision lies within my friend’s power.
Bible Verses for Reflection
Proverbs 17:17; Psalm 127:3; Ephesians 3:18–19; Matthew 18:18–19; John 13:34–35; Jeremiah 31:3; 1 Corinthians 16:14; Galatians 5:6, 13; Ephesians 4:2; Philippians 1:8; 1 Thessalonians 3:12; 5:12–13; 1 John 3:10.