If you ask any fisherman whether it makes a difference where one fishes, I do not think he will say that it does not. However, the main thing is to have a fishing rod. Fishing is a whole science that must be mastered. And in every science there are rules, as well as exceptions to the rules. Every fisherman has a special place where the fish bite best, where there are many of them, and where it is simply interesting and pleasant to engage in his favourite activity.
It is also very important to have the proper tackle and bait, for every fish has its own characteristics and tastes.
There are also ‘good fishing spots’ for catching friends. One of them is the table at which you eat wholesome food together.
If there is a vacant place at the table that no one is claiming, you can take a very advantageous position for gaining new friends. The atmosphere is relaxed, everyone is enjoying the meal, conversation becomes a pleasant addition to the beginning of friendly relations, and hearts are open to receiving a new person. And if the soul is inclined towards friendship, it can be experienced very quickly at the table. Later, that person becomes dear and close for life. And if this happens while visiting someone or at large gatherings, there is no need to think about preparing the dishes and spending time on it.
This art is taken from the life of Jesus. He greatly enjoyed eating with different people. Publicans and sinners invited Him, and He ate with them, which at that time was a challenge to society and accepted norms. But by His conduct and His attitude towards people, Christ broke down such stereotypes, giving me an example to follow.
If a person is not open to fellowship or does not wish to develop a relationship with you, then your presence at the table obliges neither you nor him to anything; you are simply eating together.
For example, if I simply approach a person and begin a conversation or try to become acquainted with him, in most cases I will be rejected, but at the table everything happens the other way round.
The gift of hospitality also includes offering food and eating it together at one table, accompanied by mutual fellowship. Sometimes this unites strangers so closely that for the rest of their lives they gratefully remember that invitation and the refreshments.
Even in Eternity, a marriage supper is being prepared for all the redeemed. We will all sit together at one table with Jesus and joyfully listen to His every word, admire Him, and look at one another with love as we anticipate the joy of new acquaintances. We will eat the fruit of the Tree of Life and other delicacies. And our kind Jesus will see the travail of His Soul and be satisfied.
In His message to Laodicea, our Lord promises that if anyone hears His voice and opens the door to Him, He will come in and sup with him, and he with Jesus. That is, in gratitude for an open heart, Jesus offers to share a meal together. In this friendly fellowship, He will be able to reveal Himself to me and also open me to Himself.
Please remember all the meals you have shared with strangers. During the meal they became friends or good acquaintances. The wall of separation fell, and you now have access to that person as someone you know, and he knows you.
When a single man wants to get to know his new female friend better, he looks for an opportunity to spend time with her at a table so that, while enjoying drinks and food, he may learn more about her. For this reason, he invites her to a café or restaurant so that they can become better acquainted. There they come to know each other better. And if they have an opportunity to prepare the food together, they learn even more about each other and retain this knowledge throughout their lives. There is something about food that draws us closer together.
When I understood this, I tried intentionally to gain friends for myself at the table, and I tell you—it works. At first I was surprised myself, and then I began using it to find new friends or maintain relationships with old ones. Miracles take place as unfamiliar hearts draw closer together.
It always makes me sad to watch those who withdraw into a corner and silently eat their bread while looking down at their plates. Unfortunately, there are such people among us as well, but they too need help in breaking down their loneliness through our presence and friendliness. The gift of communication has been given to us precisely for fellowship and for expressing our love in words. And it is so joyful to see your kind and encouraging words enter a heart and, like a seed, sprout and bear good fruit. What happiness it is to love someone whom you did not know before, but whom you have come to know, discovered, welcomed, and valued as a friend for life.
It does not always happen as simply as I describe it here, but if you move confidently towards the goal while being friendly and loving with a pure heart, the result will correspond. In any case, in the eyes of Heaven you will be an overcomer, even if the new friend runs away in fear or anger.
A loving heart respects another person’s freedom and senses the boundaries that it does not cross.
If your neighbour runs away in fear or anger, this does not necessarily mean that he was frightened or angered by you. It shows that he is afraid of fellowship and friendship. Perhaps he is ill-tempered by nature and does not wish to maintain such relationships with anyone.
Love, being meek, does not display aggression, but very gently seeks points of connection and paths to the heart.
But it is necessary to take into account that my potential friend sat down at the table to eat, while I am merely an addition to this event; therefore, he may not even look in my direction. However, this does not trouble me. There is always a fish waiting for its own hook with its own bait, but if it is hungry, then it has a better chance of becoming yours.
In this comparison, it is very important to remember that you are catching the fish not to eat it, but to place it in the aquarium of your heart, where it will feel comfortable and safe, where the tenderness of your soul will heal its wounds and work miracles of love in its heart.
From the moment your little fish enters your aquarium, it is yours and needs care, nourishment, and attention.
Jesus comes into my life to remain in it for ever. He places me in His aquarium called the ‘Ocean of Love’ and watches to ensure that the predatory fish that enter this space are overcome by me and drawn to Him as new members of God’s family.
A table spread with food has its own laws and a tremendous influence upon the human heart. And when my friend sits down at it, his senses and perception are very active. If the food is delicious, beautiful, and wholesome, then against its background I will appear the same. But if my friend is gnawing on a dry crust, then becoming closely acquainted with me may perhaps be associated with that hard food.
Love for people, tender words, attentiveness, respect, and the gift of friendliness can together bring about great transformations in the heart of an unfamiliar table companion. Most likely, he will not immediately become my friend, but the seed of love will be sown in that lonely heart, and my further conduct will contribute to its growth.
And, of course, my desire to have new friends will play the main role.
But I too do not always see a new friend in every person. I may simply eat and fail to notice my neighbour if I have other purposes for that time. Yet, understanding the powerful influence of a shared meal, I take this knowledge to heart and can use it for God’s glory. Love teaches me many useful things and takes effect when I decide to apply them in my life.
Homework 147
What did you find interesting for yourself in this lesson? In the light of this lesson, what marks the beginning of friendly relations? Why did Jesus accept the hospitality of sinners? Do you think a shared meal can be considered worship of God? Why did Jesus prepare the marriage supper for the redeemed? What touches people’s hearts during a conversation? On what important condition does Jesus make us fishers of sinners? Matthew 4:19. Please read Matthew 9:10–13; Hosea 6:6; Luke 19:5, 8; 7:33–35; 7:44–48; Acts 2:46; Romans 12:13; Matthew 22:9; Revelation 3:20; 22:3–4; Romans 12:20; Proverbs 11:25; Philippians 4:5; 2 Timothy 2:24–26; and Isaiah 53:10 in the light of our lesson.