When I begin telling others about God’s love, sharing with them the secrets of its influence upon me in my life, and explaining how wonderful it is to possess this love and live by it, those who listen to me have the right to ask me the following question: ‘But do you love me?’ And I must give an answer to this question.
If a person sees a negative answer toward himself in my life, it no longer matters to him what has been revealed to me. He begins to regard me as a mere talker and loses interest in me and in the truth I present.
This reality must always be understood when sharing with my neighbours what has been revealed to me. People have hearts and feelings, and they are very sensitive concerning themselves. They see perfectly well who is standing before them and what that person is truly like.
If the person speaking about love cannot be seen, then the imagination begins to draw an image, and the mind pictures the character I am able to discern for myself from the information received.
For example, who among you knows exactly what Jesus or even one of the apostles looked like? Perhaps we immediately picture the painting The Last Supper, in which the artist tried to express a person’s character through colour. I heard a story that an artist used a young man as the model for the image of Jesus and then, many years later, found a vagrant in the street who was very suitable for the image of Judas. While the artist was painting the portrait, the man who was posing told him that he was the very person whose face had once been used to portray Christ. I do not know how true this story is, but I like it as an illustration.
Through our lives and our attitude, we show people who we truly are. My words are good and have power only when my deeds confirm what I have said.
How, then, can I determine how sincere I am toward my neighbour? I will say plainly that hardly anyone will admit to you that he is a hypocrite or an actor playing the role of a good person. Many internet preachers take advantage of being inaccessible and at times abuse the trust of their viewers by speaking to them about their love.
But there is a God Who hates sin and approves of no playacting connected with the truth. He knows how to humble the proud, calm the irritated, and reprove the hypocritical. He desires me to be honest with myself, with Him, and with people.
And woe unto me if I try to deceive the Creator by playing the role of someone I am not. Unfortunately, there are people who succeed in doing this. And because God’s judgments are not executed speedily, the heart of man is not afraid to do evil.
Interestingly, I myself listen to someone’s declarations of love and try to understand how much they apply to me. Words of love have the strength and power to change a person’s mind; and if they are spoken directly into a neighbour’s ears, they also touch his feelings and greatly stir his thoughts.
I also confess to you that if I tell someone of my love for him, I understand what I am doing and recognize my full responsibility for what I have said, being prepared to bear the consequences of what I have resolved in my heart. I consider it dishonest to tell someone of my love without having such a resolve in my heart. It is better to say nothing than to deceive. Love is not given for one-time use, but forever.
For example, if my neighbour has done me good, my heart rejoices with happiness, and I tell him that I love him, then both of us are happy. But then clouds and trials come, and only memories remain of my love, and I tell my neighbour what I truly feel toward him. Where, then, is love? It will appear again when someone does me another good deed. And on such a swing we try to build lasting relationships. But this approach does not work.
Knowing this pattern, every person initially sees an actor in me, because the world has accustomed us to conditional love. As soon as I begin to speak, I immediately fall into the category of hypocrites. But agape love is unique in its very essence. It goes on the offensive to take the position of a victor and conquer a person’s heart forever, keeping it in that state throughout his life.
I often hear how people see their own sins in me and try to accuse me of being what they themselves are. At times it is even interesting to listen and learn whom you are dealing with. Nevertheless, every criticism and accusation makes me examine all my motives, purposes, and words again and again, while my soul turns to God with the question, ‘Is this true of me, Lord?’ Then Jesus shows me His hands and comforts me, asking me to continue loving these people truly. And once again my soul yearns for victories in love.
There is a certain sequence and pattern. When a person first hears about my love or the revelations I share, his interest is kindled. Something new enters his ears. But love judges the thoughts of the heart and begins to cause discomfort. Then the person hardens himself and sets limits upon his interest in the subject. He simply watches from a distance, and sometimes he leaves forever. But the one who remains continues watching, passing all the information through a filter of prejudice. Yet constancy in love itself shows him that these words are worth hearing, for they are full of meaning and life. The person begins cautiously to look into the essence of what he has heard. Seeing no contradiction with God’s word and no playacting in the speaker’s conduct, he decides to trust more and more. Then insight comes, and the soul dares to take the risk of opening itself. And the most unexpected thing happens. The light of the new relationship begins to illuminate every secret thought, and the person becomes ashamed of the doubts that once arose. If someone now apologizes for his evil thoughts and feelings, this is nothing new to love, but a joy in gaining a new friend forever.
I hear and see this question about love for me, and I have a positive answer for everyone. It is simply not always possible to prove something to everyone by deeds, for there are many of you and only one of me, and I am not wealthy enough to help everyone materially. But I encounter understanding in this matter as well.
It is very easy to speak about love with those who love as you do. At times, words are not even necessary for us to understand that we love one another. The Spirit of God gives this, and you cannot act otherwise. No proof is needed, and there are no unreasonable expectations. I simply know that in my life there is someone who is connected with God and who gladdens my heart by his attitude toward me. But sometimes these people also want to hear how I feel about them—not because they doubt, but because they need it as those who fight against the world and overcome while hearing only curses and accusations directed at them. And here you are, with love and blessing. What joy!
People’s expectations should be answered, and it is best to be honest. If I do not know a person, he expects nothing from me, but in his soul he tries to understand whether my love will be enough for him too. And if he sees that I have much love, he asks no unnecessary questions but simply rejoices that in this world there is someone who receives from God what he can give away.
Do not be afraid of this question, but be prepared to give an honest answer. If the answer is negative, that too is an answer, but in that case something must be changed in life with God’s help. For if I have no love, then . . . it is worth learning it.
Homework 120
What did you understand from this lesson? How often do you hear the question of whether you love someone? Are there people in your life who love you and tell you so? Do you know people who speak about love but do not live in it? Do you know how to tell people of your love for them? How do you do this? Why is it so important for deeds to follow words? Are you afraid to ask your neighbours this question? Please read Ecclesiastes 5:4; Isaiah 44:26; 55:10–11; John 13:1; 17:26; Proverbs 17:17; 18:24; 24:26; Song of Solomon 5:16; James 2:8–9, 15–17; and 1 John 3:18–21 in the light of our lesson.